This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
zippers are such a cool invention
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
