I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
We left the knife in your bed.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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