Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
