Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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