We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
