I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
