Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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