What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
