hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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