brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
