6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I hate all girls vehemently.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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