Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
What drink are we having for lunch?
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Randomize
