One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
