Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
