Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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