Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
It's just like the Real World with babies
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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