ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Randomize