I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize