could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
