You're completely useless in the revolution.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
