it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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