My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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