also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
