the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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