I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize