I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
