His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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