Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
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