everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
