Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
is wine microwaveable?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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