From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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