chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
zippers are such a cool invention
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
