Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
