I wish I could punch you in the face.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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