I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
