somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
