Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
