You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
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