Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Congratulations! We have a period
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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