Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
soo... how was my night?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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