call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
