I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
