Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
