I don't think brook has ever known best
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Randomize
