Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
