Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
