I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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