I seem to have left my pride at pride
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
