This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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