Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
