My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
