If that was your dad, he is hot
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize